jonas 3d!!!

so today i have a half day.
and me and my friend are going to see
jonas brothers 3d concert!
better be worth the freakin $15 i paid for 1 ticket!
then im headed off to randi's out in wentzville.
what a weekend this will be..

im sitting in child development.
and this is seriously the only time of day
while im at school
to get on here and say something.
i never remember to get on at home.

so i hope everyone has a beautiful and wonderful weekend
love lots!!

addiction

so a typical good mormon should be addicted to reading the scriptures correct?
well im not sorry. im addicted to something much much stronger.
and they tell us that music is bad. that basically we should listen to church music and classical. um. sorry but i like something i can relate to.
and HOT DOG! i found it.
everything i listen to i can relate to and lately im addicted to taylor swift and all the songs on her fearless cd...WHICH I WANT SOOO BADLY
and then omgeezus...the veronicas. they rock my socks.
but anyway. i just wanted to get that out
....
im really depressed.
and im really tired of friends and others telling wait and it will happen.
everything gets better. blah blah blah.
im so done with that.
cause right now im 18. NEVER been kissed. NEVER held hands that way with a guy
seriously if u count dancing with a guy and holding his hand ur nuts. cause then my sister meagan would have gotten more than me and shes 10!!!
and im tired of the freaking fat jokes. although its all true. cause im freaking huge. and i think thats a part of me STILL being single. boooorrrriiiinnnggg!!
but really its hard for girls to lose weight cause of all the stress guys put on us
and im hugely stressed right now.
college, PROM! which i still dont have a date. and im really upset cause i want a date for my freaking senior prom!!!
gah now im crying...
what a diary entry this is.
hooosha avril lavigne. she is the shiznit. and im proud to say that her songs make me cry even more. cause they are sooooooo true!!!!
i just wanna go home. and im already home...

text me if u have my number. its unlimited. but my patience on waiting for a guy is soooooooo limited. so stop telling me it will happen. cause ITS NOT!!

listen to avril lavigne's nobody's home. cause its me...

cookies in foods class

dude wow those cookies were AMAZING!
i have never made chocolate chip cookies from scratch
and them turn out this amazing.
although im having some issues with this crazy weird
guy who stares at me and like follows me.
and dude i mean i want space.
like you get to close and ill turn and punch
i said that sorry to be brutally honestly
and pretty rude. but still. i need my space home fry.
haha, so anyway..

we made some seriously amazing cookies. really good.
and when i came into 7th hour i had a huge grin on
and the interpreter asked me why i was smiling
and i gave her a cookie and then everyone wanted one.
thankfully i had a few with me. and i was able to get one
but i think we are making the rest of our batch tomorrow.
so i hope to get more. haha

well im out.
going to take some photos with photobooth
see ya later!

retarded

my school is anyway.
cause it wont let me look at my blog..

random spazzing...may commence.
sitting in my child development class.
finishing our brochures.
computers are NUTS!
my head hurts.

wow so i got this random text this morning
and i swear people these days who come up
with stupid forward messages HAVE NO LIFE!
this is the one i got this morning...

i heard the saddest story this morning
about a 3 year old girl who was so neglected
by her mother that the dogs started to raise
the child. she brawls, and barks as if she is a dog.
the child ate dog food and chewed on bones as well.
the mother went to jail ofcourse and the child is go
stare care where they plan to help the child relize she
is a human and not a dog. lets stop child abuse!
true story. heard it on cornbread in the morning

CAN YOU SERIOUSLY GET ANY WEIRDER!!
oh sanap. time to go..BYE!

assembly with evander holyfield and choir fun with the seniors

some of the best fun i have had this year!

school yesterday!

was amazing!
we had a school assembly and GUES WHO WAS THERE!!!
evander holyfield! 4 time world heavy weight champion
yeah i had NO idea who he was till yesterday.
but it was awesome.
he talked about us living out our dreams.
and we can do it!
and we got free shirts and his friend came and we got a free ringtone from his newest music video
that our school was THE FIRST to see. hadnt been aired on tv yet and we saw it!
freaking awesome YO!

and yesterday was the pep assembly before evander.
it was...eh. i hate pep assemblies. cause they dont pep me up. lol
but me and my friend katie siebuhr made some wicked awesome senior chicks shirts.
i have pictures. ill put them up in a minute.
we had our senior group in choir make these shirts. so we looked good. haha
your just jealous cause we had more neon than you did on!

haha. well im making spaghetti for lunch.
im such a great cook. woohoo!
ill post another with pictures. much love!

first kiss? but in a dream =*[

so last night i had some wacky cooky dreams.
and the one that stood out to me..was..

MY FIRST KISS!!! <--- that is what we should call it. =]




so it starts out like im playing a video game, except the fact that im in the game...=/
and me and my friends are driving a mini van, well more of a hippie van! GO 60's!!
and then we were on this windy road in the middle of a jungle thingy.
and you know that game wack a mole?

well this time it was alligators and we had to
drive over them and try to not hit them depending on their size.
well by middle of my dream it was me all by myself and i was running and having to
swim from these alligators. i was very fast. thank you VERY much. and so i got to this island
and there was a house type of thing.

(((lord cain was the one to see the dark human dolls...)))


^and if some of you have read godchild you will understand what i say... i walked into a back room where i woman stood and she said if u wanna see your friends they are right in here. so i followed her...she led me into a room with two large tables and on top were tarps with funny bulges underneath and i thought omg what has she done!!!
she pulled the covers off them and they looked very much the same just not breathing and i started crying. and one of them gets up off the table and comes to me and he says please dont cry we are all right. see she has done us a favor. we can live forever. and it made me worse. he felt hollow.

then outta no where he looked at me in that way that i melted. and i kissed him.
but it felt like i was kissing a robot. and i didnt like it. till some how i had the feeling that they were pretending to have turned or whatever so that she wouldnt kill them.
and then he kissed me for real. like as if that kiss turned him human 100%
and thats when i woke up. i couldnt take it anymore.
im so sick of my kisses being in my dreams. and getting married in my dreams.
but in those i cant see the persons face. its like a huge blank.

but this one was just so real. i wish that it could have been..



thats one thing i hate about being a hopeless romantic.
i just keep dreaming of my happiness and it never comes.
i havent held a guys hand. i havent been that close to a guy.
i just feel empty inside and it makes me cry.

maybe in my dream the hollow-ness of him was how i feel.
and him kissing me was just a mirrage.
im done. i have a spa to get ready for later.
i cant take remembering my dreams. they really bum me out...

wanna know something

sitting in photo journalism and you think that a blog would be ok to check out.
but god forbid that you cant actually view the page. its weird stuff.

RACHEL LUTE SAYS HI! to all my readers

i wanna listen to my music. cause im that bored.
well not really the people that im chillin in the corner with are pretty awesome

so anyway i dont really have much to say today. or really anyday.
cause my life really isnt that interesting.

currently...
mood : bored, tired
clothing : comfy jeans and t-shirt.
music : nothing...sigh. i miss my music.
time : 1:49 pm
favorite color : blue. well cause thats alot of what im wearing. score
favorite food of the day : bagel bites. OMG! had those last night.
what can i say im in love with bagel bites.
so its a random moment...
maybe one of these days ill start some weekly thing.


so im not liking these macs. the keys are WAY to far apart.
gah its so difficult to type.

so have you noticed that blue eyes are really mysterious in the rain light?
almost grey and misty. but they pop when to sun comes out. or how about hazel eyes? have u ever really wondered the real reason why hazel eyes change colors when u wear different colors or when ur mood changes.
idk i was just curious.

well im gonna go um....yeah. BYE!!!

oh its colorful font calling?! where did it go?!

yeah so i screwed up my blog somehow.
i cant get color into my font. or change the size.
or do anything else that would be crazy.
i kinda sorta ok maybe alot miss it tons!
what do i do? where can i get the wonderful rainbow back into my font?!
and im not really all that creative with the nutso html or whatever thingys that u put in <> to get what u want either.
i think seriously im technologically retarded cause things fall apart and things break.
so please help me!! i wanna make things purdy again. =]

its been a while

wow when was the last time i wrote on here?
geez moses about a month ago. time to update.
my life is pretty boring right now.
well sorta. i was crowned princess the first saturday of the month in indiana.
score! i looked good but felt like poo.
had stomach flu... well i might as well just tell the story.
the first weekend was Reenactors convention..SYW..devision
in Mitchell indiana at the spring mill state park cabin inn.
HOOSHA IT WAS NICE!
i felt like poo the moment we started driving. so maybe sitting in the back gave me car sick idk. but i was not a happy camper on the way up. coughing and ew.
i had a photo journalism assignment to do that weekend. so i took my camera.
there were some really cool classes that i took.
making bodices, taking the right kinda pictures at events and a cannon one about grenades. woo that one was interesting haha.
but saturday around noon i couldnt make it. i had to go back to the room. and i slept for 8 hours off and on. and when i came back down it was time for dinner and i was dressed all fancy. and after dinner was over i found out that i was to be crowned princess. and my prince...hooosha! he was dang fine!
so we helped pass out awards and then the dance! we were flirting all night.
and danced with each other to almost every dance. would have been them all but it got hot to dang fast. haha but we now stay in touch. i have his number.

now this weekend was another dance the Kings Ball. aka the mardi gras of 1750's time period haha
i danced all night long. took my friend maggie with me and we had a blast!

but now im just bored. got a cold 3 day weekend and i dont have anything to do...hmmm.
i wanna dance some more. i love dancing. and playing dress up...